Getting Back In the Game: Online Dating After Divorce
It is quite understandable that after a failed marriage, whatever the cause of it, most people find it hard to start from scratch again. They have obviously learned a handful of lessons from their marriage and want to desist from making them again. However, even then, getting back in the game requires a lot of effort and mostly on the guy’s part. To them, starting all over again means meeting new people, going on dates, establishing a connection and letting go of the past. Being a recently divorced person, it only makes things more difficult. The consequence: instead of finding physical dates, they resort to online dating. Reason being; it is less time consuming and doesn’t involve wasting time on people who aren’t looking for a serious relationship. If it clicks, it clicks; if it doesn’t, you move on without having to carry any emotional baggage.
But that too doesn’t come undemanding. Online dating after divorce can be pretty hard if you aren’t sure what you are looking for or should expect of a potential partner. Therefore, to get back in the game smoothly and let fate be on your side, it is essential that you keep these very basic yet important things in mind.
- Choose A Reputable Site To Begin With: When setting up online profiles, consider a website that seems trustworthy and free of spam. Read online reviews about how a particular site has helped people look for partners and do some research on your end. Relying on a quality website might cost you more but the chances of finding the right partner do increase. If you are ready to get back in the game, why waste your time and energy on people who are just looking for a fling and nothing serious? The thing with reputable sites is that they scrutinize every profile thoroughly by conducting proper background checks to ensure that no scam or fake profiles are being set up.
- Consider International Dating: This advice may seem out of the blue but it has actually worked for thousands of people. International dating allows you to meet new people, explore their cultures and might even get you off the couch to meet a potential partner in person if things go as planned. Sites like noborderforlove.com allow American men to meet Ukrainian and Russian women who are looking for true love, making it easier for them to interact and learn about each other through interpreters.
- Date When You Think It’s Time to Date: Just because a bunch of your friends have been pushing you by saying, “it’s time you are ready to go out and date again”, it’s best to go with your own gut. No one but you knows how you are feeling or what you have gone through. Trusting someone else’s word on a matter so grave isn’t the wisest choice to make. Think about it for a second; if the thought of being in a relationship again terrifies you, then you are not ready. No point in wasting your and someone else’s time. However, if the same thought excites you, you are all set to take the stage.
- Come Clean About Your Previous Relationship In Your Profile: Take your time when setting up your profile, be it on any site. Abstain from saying too much or giving away very little as both the conditions might not make you a standout candidate. The most important thing is to come clean about why you want to date.
- Don’t Mention Your Ex-Wife: The whole point of dating is to start over. So, mentioning your ex-wife when with a potential candidate doesn’t sound like an ideal ice-breaker. It may seem tempting to talk about something that is very recent and life-changing but the other person might not feel so. The only vibe one may get is that you are looking for a rebound relationship and not an actual relationship. So, try to keep the ex-wife talk to a minimum. No one wants to be your pity date, so don’t make them feel like one.
- Don’t Give Away Your Personal Details: Online dating to a divorced man is different than what it is for a single unmarried man. They understand relationships slightly better than the ones who haven’t been married but since they had been married, even if for a shorter period, they have been out of the online dating scene, which is a disadvantage. They are easier to prey on as they are wounded and hurt. They trust what they are told and appreciate the attention they are getting, without even realizing that their vulnerability is what makes them the perfect candidate for a scam. Therefore, it is always advised never to lend your personal details like phone number, email or home address to someone unless you have been talking to them for some time.
- Give Your Relationship Some Time: It is not a secret that both of you are mature and must have had past relationships. If you are expecting magical sparks to light between the two of you, you are keeping your expectations high. Establishing a solid chemistry may take time. The first online session might not go well but to base the future on that and reject a potential partner seems childish. Every relationship requires time and effort. Who knows; the woman you talked to had a bad day at the office and didn’t really feel like talking much. Don’t ditch someone based on the first interaction. You too are damaged so it is best to allow the other person to open up and understand you better.
Hoping these tips come in handy when you are trying to set up your online dating profile. Remember, it all begins with choosing the right website to set up an account on.